I've been playing top because that's where I usually feel at home, as a frontline character so I can soak damage intended for my team, one thing I've noticed, the majority of junglers ignore top lane completely. I lost count of how many times the enemy jungler has been camping the top side of the map, even if they couldn't gank me because wards and I know they're there, they will still maintain presence top to a point I can't push the lane without being immediately ganked, while my jungler is off in Narnia not ganking any lane, or ganking and dying.
Or in situations where I am winning the lane, enemy jungler doesn't bother helping his team, so we easily have control over Herald, I tell my jungler to do herald since I established vision and enemy laner is stuck in lane, nope, completely ignored. Or insulted and told my lane is useless.
Every champion I play top can do just fine by themselves, but ganks definitely help move things along and establish dominance + allowing me to secure vision over herald and prevent my laner from going to herald while I can freely roam. Except that never happens.
I've lost count of the games where the enemy laner played poorly and fed me, then I went on to roam and essentially carry the game only to watch the enemy jungler rage, while he didn't lift a single finger to help his top laner for the entire game. I have had a few games where junglers ganked my lane, which quickly resulted in me spiraling out of control and dominating the entire map. But this happens rarely because usually top lane gets ignored.
Even if you don't want to gank top, that's fine, it would be amazing if you would, but just show up there. Walk up in vision, scare the enemy laner, show pressure via presence and that he can't do as he pleases because you might be around. Get him to blow his flash, that is huge.
The vast majority of top matches are decided from the champion pick screen, you may not like it, but it is, there's very few champions that aren't too badly countered, Irelia is one of them, everything is skill there, Morde wins after level 6, there's not much you can do against him alone. The rest, if you get one of your counters, you absolutely NEED your jungler to help you, or you are going to likely feed the enemy laner or be so far behind to a point there's nothing you can do.
The situation is even worse when the enemy jungler builds a house in top lane and repeteadly tower dives you with his laner, while your jungler never shows up. This results in a fed top and a fed jungler, and if our jungler is doing nothing in return, that just makes the situation that much worse. If the enemy jungler builds a house in top lane, do something somewhere, gank mid, gank bottom, put pressure on everyone to force their jungler to move, you **have** to do something to get him to respond or you will end up with 2 fed enemies, a laner that's far behind, and most likely a lost game.