Nothing special just your average gold player that wants to reach plat. Everytime I go into a game I already feel very nervous and after the game completed no matter if win or loss I feel exhausted. I like the game, the core aspects of it at least but I don't think I can play at all. Getting so much cancer after each loss or just feeling relieved after a win shouldn't be what you're supposed to feel. You're supposed to feel enjoyment. Should I take a break? Well I semi did that not really playing much ranked at least going outside and stuff but then I won't get better and actually acomplish my goal of at least reaching plat this season. Maybe it's because I one trick Azir? Since he ain't the best soloq champ atm but I invested over 400 games on him already and playing a new champ wouldn't be the same.
I am in desperate need of advice. What should I do to loosen up and find joy in this game again? It probably sounds really dumb to most people but I feel drained, like League sucked every bit of motivation and life force out of me. I started writing this because playing mages sucks right now and the whole jungle meta gives me severe headaches and cancer.